Self-care is NOT selfish

Being a fashion mom blogger has always been something I wanted to do as a hobby, but taking that first step into the lens was difficult for me. I naturally disliked having photos taken, and whenever I took photos my left upper lip would twitch during the entire shoot (ohhh those nerves!) along with unsettling nerves I didn’t have time to start a blog or any other activities because my family “needed me”. Prior to having babies (and yes, I still call them my little babies although they are 4 and 2 years old. Don’t correct me, just get over it 😜) I always got dressed from head to toe and spent hours, literally, doing my hair and makeup. When we would have a girls trip I was always the first one in the shower so that I could have more time to perfect my canvas aka face. Getting dolled up was so fun for me!
In 2013, Ryland was born and things changed a tad bit for me and I slowly stopped putting on makeup and doing my hair. Makeup didn’t define who I was, but it was a sign that I was letting go of myself. Losing that side of me, the side that enjoyed getting ready and enjoyed all things that sparkled.

In 2015, Rori was born and this is when things really went down hill for me. I was diagnosed with postpartum depression (story for another time) and I didn’t take care of myself at all. I lost my appetite, stopped getting ready entirely (pretty sure that I wore the same velour sweat suit for months), and 100% of the time I just didn’t care what I looked like. I couldn’t find “me” anymore. The girl who loved sitting in the mirror for hours getting ready while blasting the latest hits and dancing around in an oversized t-shirt. That girl was gone.

I decided to take a leap of faith and start piecesofemerald for so many reasons! One of the reasons- I was hoping to be able to escape reality for a couple of hours and play dress up while providing tips and tricks for fashion and mom life to other gals like me. However, blogging and being active on social media has brought apart of me back that I didn’t realized I missed so much! It wasn’t the material things or the makeup, it was the confidence, the feeling of having time to myself, the feeling that just because I’m a mom of 2 doesn’t mean that “I” should be gone (and my mamas out there, you all know what I’m talking about). My babies deserve the best version of me, for me to be a great mom for them I have to take care of myself and do things that I enjoy as well. I know that it is not always easy to take the time for myself, as a mom of 2, full time student at UC Davis, and a full time employee, but I need to find the time because if I lose myself then my babies will get the worst part of me. I always had that “because I’m a mom I can’t do XYZ” excuse, but being a mom isn’t a bad word! We should embrace our mom life and be able to be an extraordinary mom while feeling fabulous mentally, emotionally, and physically. Most days I still rock the “mom bun” and joggers with spilled milk on my tee, but I’m much happier today with who I and because of piecesofemerald. Messy mom buns are hot, but so is a head full of curls. I want the best of both worlds. It may be the getting ready, going to the gym, yoga, finishing a book or even just 1 hour to do absolutely nothing, whatever your definition of “self-care” is. I no longer feel guilty for taking a little while longer to get ready or actually wash my hair. I finally understand that self-care is absolutely NOT being selfish. My babies are healthy, happy, and loved by so many.

Thank you for allowing me to write and following me on this journey!


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  1. November 8, 2017 / 5:56 pm

    This is a wonderful post Jen! I totally relate to what you have shared here.

    • Jennifer Vatthongxay
      November 8, 2017 / 6:07 pm

      thank you, Ashna! I️ am glad it spoke to one mama! ❤️